The Church of Oprah

The Joel Osteen Lie

What Christians Don't Understand about Gay People

The majority of Christians are so homophobic, they don't want to be around gay people, be friends with gay people, and definitely don't want to have gay people coming to their church. The reason is because most people fear what they don't understand. A lot of Christians think, "Why would a person want to be gay?" As if a gay person wakes up one morning and says to themselves, "Self, today is the day that I am going to choose to be shunned by my family, un-accepted at the church, and live a life-style displeasing to God." No, that is not normally how it happens.

So you ask, well how do you know? I have done a lot of research with Christians who used to be gay, and have been delivered from it. I have close friends who have come through a gay lifestyle, and I have made it a point to attend seminars about understand and ministering to gay people. But I think what we have to realize is that if we want to reach out to people who are gay, who need to come to a better understanding of how that came about in their life.

Let's take one instance. I know of a friend who did not have success with girls. I mean, he had girlfriends, went on dates, but was not succesfull. Because of these happenings, he eventually started believing that he was not meant to be with girls, or that he could not get along with them. He had plenty of guy friends, played sports, you would have never thought he was gay. But he started believing that was his route in life. That doesn't mean he started going on dates with guys, or exploring it in some way, but he just started believing it. And as you know, if you believe something long enough, it becomes the truth. This is called "Self-fulfilling prophecy" if I remember correctly from psychology in college.

That is just one example. If you would have thought anyone would have been gay, you would have probably expected me to be gay. I was friends with a lot of girls, I took dance class (and excelled at it) I wasn't that great at sports, I was very involved in theatre, and guys would even tell me that I must be gay because I decided not to have sex with my girlfriend in high-school until we were married. I remember their words, "Man there is no way you have dated that girl for so long, have not had sex with her, and not be gay." But I never believed those lies. I knew we weren't created gay. No one is. And I will disagree with my psychology professor from college who told me that homosexuality was biological. I responded by telling her all the research I have read that it wasn't. Like cases were sets of identical twins (biologically identical) and only one of the twins becomes gay. Her response was that I read bad research. I should have walked out of class that day. What I had read was the Bible, and because of this post, God does not create evil, it is simply what happens when there is an absence of God.

Somewhere along the way, there was an absence of God in these individuals lives. That is where Christians step in. We must become Christ to all people. We must let them know how much God is so insanely in love with them, that He desperately wants to become their first passion. So what do we need to do? We need to become informed. I would recommend that you go to www.exodus.to, and check out their resources which are not only for helping people who are struggling with homosexuality, but to help the rest of us understand how to help them. The second thing would just be to talk with them about their experiences and where they are in their life. You would be surprised at how many people believe they are gay, but do not want to live that lifestyle. That right there shows us that it is not just something they choose out of the blue one day. We must help them through the process of healing without judgement. Their sin is just like the ridiculous percentage of Christian men who struggle with porn, teenage Christians having sex before marriage, etc. Maybe you can share your experience of a gay friend, or God delivering you from homosexuality, or the current struggle that you are in.

What Exactly does a Youth Pastor do?

Alot of people have no idea what the job of a Youth Pastor entails. Hopefully, this will give you a new appreciation for that guy (or gal) at your church who always seems to be running around with their head cut off (because they probably are). And if you are a Youth Pastor, this will be a great resource to have on hand when people say, "so what exactly do you do?"

   The Typical Youth Workers Schedule is filled by being a:

1. Speaker
2. Preacher
3. Sunday School Teacher
4. Lesson Planner
5. Website developer
6. Mentor
7. Counselor (and if you are also pastor to college/young adults, that includes pre-martial counseling)
8. Worship Leader
9. Audio Technician
10. The In-House I.T. Guy
11. Evangelist
12. Graphic Designer
13. Video Editor
14. Event Planner
15. Public Relations Specialist
16. Copy Writer (As in writing engaging announcements and newsletter articles about events and the ministry)
17. Volunteer Screener
18. Volunteer Trainer
19. Conflict Manager
20. Janitor
21. Normally a handy-man (cause a lot of stuff gets broken)
22. Drama Team Leader
23. Puppet Team Director
24. Sometimes also Children's Ministry Director (which would about double this list)
25. Fundraising Planner
26. Curriculum Writer
27. Curriculum Screener
28. Voracious Reader
29. Prayer Warrior
30. Student of the Word
31. On-going learner
32. A lot of times a full or part-time student
33. A lot of times bi-vocational
34. Vision Caster
35. Web Master (it rhymed)
36. Networker (As in building relationships inside and outside the church)
37. Disciple Maker
38. Power-Point Pro
39. Add your own via comments section

You might be wondering why I'm posting this at 10:00am.  That is because on Wednesdays I go into the office at 11:00am and stay till 9:00pm.  At least all these things make 10 hour days go by quickly.

Their you have it.  Youth Worker in a Nutshell.  "Help, I'm in a Nutshell." (From Austin Powers)

Should Christians be Republican or Democrat?

What the Legalistic KJV Only Crowd Doesn't Know

I came across something very, very interesting last week. But let me preface this by explaining why this new found information was so important.

1. I know family members who attend Churches that only allow the "Authorized King James Version"
2. I once had a family that was not going to attend a wedding because they thought I didn't believe in the Bible (as in the King James Version)
3. About a year ago there was a young man who visited our Church who wrote myself and the Pastor a 10-page thesis about how we were funding satan's ministry by buying Bible's that were not King James.
4. I had a man tell me that no one in our ministry could come to Christ under anything other than the preaching of the KJV. wow.
   

The list could go on and on, but those are just a few highlights. Let me make clear however that I believe the King James Version is a great translation. The nicest Bible that I have, which was given to me by a mentor upon my graduation from High School is a New King James and I love it. I have never tried to claim that the King James is not the Word of God. It is just as much the Word of God as the NASB, the ESV, the Greek Testamentum on my desk, the Dead Sea Scrolls that I saw at the Discovery Place in Charlotte, and the E-Sword Bible Program which I have on my computer at home that opens up about 20 translations.

However, it has always irked me over the years that some have tried to make the point that the KJV is the only version that one should use. They make claims like other versions have parts taken out (the reason being is because the majority of texts did not contain certain parts that the KJV decided to put it). None of which make a significant theological difference. All the versions which I have ever used still preach Jesus crucified, and he being the only hope of salvation. If any translation of the Bible shows that Jesus Christ died for our sin, then it is not heresy, or going to send anyone to hell. (as some have claimed)

So what I did find out of note was that the original 1611 KJV did contain the apocrypha. If you don't know what the apocrypha is, just wikipedia it. Now this does nothing to my opinion about using the KJV or for myself the New KJV, but I think it makes a point about those who claim that is the "only" real version of the Bible, because most of them don't know what they are talking about. And if you are reading this and you think the KJV is the only real version, you don't know what you are talking about either. Because the KJV version that you may have in your hand is not even the real one from 1611. If it was, it would contain the apocrypha, and it would also be written in OLDE ENGLISH, which is not even spoken anymore. Take THAT you legalistic Pharisees!!! - But if you are using the KJV, it is still a good translation, just know it isn't the only translation, because heaven forbid someone in China would need another translation for them to read, or do we expect them to learn English so they can read the "only real authorized version" of the Bible.

p.s. - while doing spell check, it tried to tell me that satan should have been capitalized. There should be a Christian spell-checker, because I don't recognize him as being worthy of capitalization.

10 things Youth Pastors should NOT do today

1. Read other youth pastor's twitters about how awesome their group was and feel sorry
2. Quit
3. Leave the youth room like it was left last night
4. Spend all day "researching" on the internet
5. Take on another project. You have enough to focus on right now.
6. Immediately respond to that email from a parent who believes you taught heresy
7. Talk negatively about any other staff member, including your Pastor.
8. Spend all day coming up with cool ideas without writing them down.
9. Hit the reminder button telling you your newsletter article is due
10. Think that you have it all figured out
    

10 things Youth Pastors should do Today

1. Write a card/cards to any students who were not at your weekly program
2. Post a write up on your blog about what exciting things happened during your program
3. Spend 15 minutes organizing your office
4. Input a few of those visitor information sheets into your database (I like gmail contacts)
5. Spend time in the Word (not a part of lesson prep time)
6. Go to your youth area and spend time in prayer there (won't be as many distractions as are in the office)
7. Go eat lunch with a student at their school
8. Check and see if you have any birthdays this week
9. Let your Senior Pastor know you're doing all this
10. Plan something special for your spouse this evening

Do you have suggestions on what a youth Pastor should do every day? Let us hear them.

Original Poem - The Hypocrite Man

What do I think about the hypocrite man?

With the smile on his face

And the Word in his hand

He preaches real big

And can talk the talk

But when he leaves church

He doesn't walk the walk

Everyone praises him

Gives him temporary pride

But when he gets home

He's empty inside

It used to be real

Way back in the day

But at some point he lost it

Just where, he can't say

So now all he can do

Is continue to act

And maybe one day

The real will come back.

The first half of this was completed 1/25/08. It was finished 8/22/08. Would love to hear your comments

Death of a Dear Friend

I hope this doesn't violate any blogging laws

We've been talking about the rule of "The More, the More..." from the book entitled "The Little Black book of networking. (link on the right, or check it out here.) Basically the rule is "The more you give, the more people will give back." There was an excellent article in Jeffrey Gitomer's Weekly Ezine, Sales Caffeine, that touched right on this topic. You can sign up for his newsletter at www.salescaffeine.com. I thought this was better than anything that I could come up with today, so I would go ahead and post it for the readers of Healthy-Wealthy-Wise.

9 Ways to Make People Feel Essential
by Scott Ginsberg

Yes, making someone feel “important” and “valued” and “needed” is a HUGE part of being an approachable leader.

But that’s not enough.

If you truly want to win with people, you need to make them feel essential.

Here’s a list of ten practices to do so:

1. Three simple words. “I appreciate you.” Not, “I appreciate that…” and not “I appreciate what you’ve…” No. “I appreciate YOU.” Small change, huge difference. My friend John always closes his emails with this phrase and it makes me feel like a million bucks, every time. Who do you appreciate?

2. Four simple words. “I believe in you.” NOTE: This doesn’t work unless you look people straight in the eye. My friend Harlan says this to his students all the time, and they LOVE him because he believes in them. Who do you believe in?

3. Take notes. Taking notes is proof. Taking notes keeps you mindful in the conversation. Taking notes honors someone’s thoughts. Taking notes is respectful. Taking notes increases someone’s self-esteem. Not to mention, if you don’t write it down, it never happened. Do you carry a notebook or jotter with you at all times?

4. Come back to notes. At a later date, refer back to the notes you took while listening to somebody. If possible, physically show that person the notes you took. Explain how you’ve applied their ideas since originally writing them down. How are you reinforcing the size of your ears?

5. Tell people to write things down. This practice takes note taking one step further. Next time someone says something powerful, instead of YOU jotting it down, tell HER to jot it down. It not only honors her thoughts; it gives her a chance to capture something valuable that she may not have recognized until you said something. How are you encouraging people’s inner poet?

6. Ask people to repeat things. Not because you didn’t understand their point; but because their insight was powerful. This demonstrates your desire for clarity. It also gives them a chance to rephrase, repeat or re-tweak their original idea, making it as strong as possible. How do you ask for clarification?

7. Cheer people on. The more cheerleaders people have, the easier it is for them to win. For example: Ever seen The Packers play a home game at Lambeau Field in December? Insane. Even if the opposing team wins, you KNOW their players were scared shitless the whole time. Are you that supportive of YOUR people?

8. Bring people joy. If you concentrate on doing this at least three times a day, your life won’t just BE swell; it will swell with happiness and purpose. And so will the lives of the people you touch. Try playing the “Let’s See How Many People I Can Make Smile Today” game. How many people did you look in the eye and say thank you to yesterday?

9. Acknowledge everybody. This one shouldn’t even be on my list. But, because not everybody practices this simple act of approachability, I’ve included it. So, slow down. Stay present. Hold your eye contact with everyone you encounter for one additional second. ONE second. That’s what Bill Clinton does. And see if you can acknowledge every single person you encounter for one day. It’s harder than you think. Then again, it all depends on what you see when you see people. How many coworkers did you go out of your way to avoid yesterday?

10. Remember people’s names. Here’s another one that shouldn’t (have) to be on this list, but alas. So, here’s the plan. First, stop telling yourself you suck at remembering names. Next, go buy Remember Every Name Every Time by Ben Levy. Next, start asking people to remind you when you forget their name, as opposed to insultingly saying, “Yeah, um, what your name again?” Also, start silently quizzing yourself on people’s names as you walk into the room. And consider asking other people to help if you get stumped. Ultimately, if you actually commit yourself to doing a better job of remembering names, you will remember them. Come on. You know names hold the key. You know names are everything. Just do it. How many books have you read about remembering people’s names?

Essential.

It’s a word that derives from the Latin essentia, which means, “essence.”

Yes.

That’s what being an approachable leader is all about.

Honoring and loving and acknowledge the essence of another person.

LET ME ASK YA THIS…
How are you making people feel essential?

LET ME SUGGEST THIS...
For the list called, "30 Ways to become the Most Interesting Person You Know," send an email to me, and I'll send you the list for free!

Scott Ginsberg, aka "The Nametag Guy," is the author of eight books, an award-winning blogger and the creator of NametagTV.com. He's the only person in the world who wears a nametag 24-7 and teaches businesspeople worldwide about approachability. For more info about books, speaking engagements customized online training programs or to Rent Scott's Brain for a one-on-one coaching session, call 314/256-1800 or email scott@hellomynameisscott.com.

101 Ways to Cope with/ Reduce Stress

I have had these on file for a long time, and they have always come in handy. Just wanted to share with the readers of healthy, wealthy, wise.

1. Get up 15 minutes earlier
2. Prepare for the morning the night before
3. Avoid tight fitting clothes
4. Avoid relying on chemical aids
5. St appointments ahead
6. Don't rely on your memory... write it down
7. Practice preventive maintenance
8. Make duplicate keys
9. Say "no" more often
10. Set priorities in your life
11. Avoid negative people
12. Use time wisely
13. Simplify meal times
14. Always make copies of important papers
15. Anticipate your needs
16. Repair anything that doesn't work properly
17. Ask for help with the jobs you dislike
18. Break large tasks into bite size portions
19. Look at problems as challenges
20. Look at challenges differently
21. Unclutter your life
22. Smile
23. Be prepared for rain
24. Tickle a baby
25. Pet a friendly dog/cat
26. Don't try to know all the answers
27. Look for a silver lining
28. Say something nice to someone
29. Teach a kid to fly a kite
30. Walk in the rain
31. Schedule play time into every day
32. Take a bubble bath
33. Be aware of the decisions you make
34. Believe in yourself
35. Stop saying negative things to yourself
36. Visualize yourself winning
37. Develop your sense of humor
38. Stop thinking tomorrow will be a better day
39. Have goals for yourself
40. Dance a jig
41. Say hello to a stranger
42. Ask a friend for a hug
43. Look up at the starts
44. Practice breathing slowly
45. Learn to whistle a tune
46. Read a poem
47. Listen to a symphony
48. Watch a ballet
49. Read a story curled up in bed
50. Do a brand new thing
51. Stop a bad habit
52. Buy yourself a flower
53. Take time to smell the flowers
54. Find support from others
55. Ask someone to be your "vent-partner"
56. Do it today
57. Work at being cheerful and optimistic
58. Put safety first
59. Do everything in moderation
60. Pay attention to your appearance
61. Strive for Excellence NOT perfection
62. Stretch your limits a little each day
63. Look at a work of art
64. Hum a jingle
65. Maintain your weight
66. Plant a tree
67. Feed the birds
68. Practice grace under pressure
69. Stand up and stretch
70. Always have a plan "b"
71. Learn a new doodle
72. Memorize a joke
73. Be responsible for your feelings
74. Learn to meet your own needs
75. Become a better listener
76. Know your limitations and let others know them too
77. Tell someone to have a good day in pig latin
78. Throw a paper airplane
79. Excercise every day
80. Learn the words to a new song
81. Get to work early
82. Clean out one closet
83. Play patty cake with a toddler
84. Go on a picnic
85. Take a different route to work
86. Leave work early (with permission)
87. Put air freshener in your car
88. Watch a movie and eat popcorn
89. Write a note to a far away friend
90. Go to a ball game and shout
91. Cook a meal and eat it by candle light
92. Recognize the importance of unconditional love
93. Remember that stress is an attitude
94. Keep a journal
95. Practice a monster smile
96. Remember you always have options
97. Have a support network of people, places, things
98. Quit trying to fix other people
99. Get enough sleep
100. Talk less and listen more
101. Freely praise other people